News from CallMeSwellington

  1. The slow realization that he had been screwed, still warms me on cold nights. That was actually the one time when I thought I should call him at the hotel: "Hey Sasquatch! It's Swellington!, How did I know you were in a Swiss hotel? I was the guy who sent you there, You should call work too, they're looking for you"


  3. I have a thing about oranges. I was 11 or 12 and was with a friend who was in a soccer league playing a match in the park. They had juice and orange wedges for the players. I took one from the table and while I was eating it this "team mother" came up to me and snatched it out of my hand and threw it away she said "Those aren't for you". To this day I can't eat oranges without thinking about her and my embarrassment.

  4. did he ever try to get back at her? hopefully not, but if he DID, what happened?

  5. No, he must've talked to a lawyer or someone who advised him he wasn't in a position to litigate, she never heard a peep.

  6. Did she set up the new office across the hall from the old one? ;)

  7. On a different floor. She was going to name it something that was similar to her old company, but we decided it would be too risky in terms of lawsuit exposure.

  8. Are you still in contact with them and had to do dubious stuff because you got in their debt?

  9. The old man died years ago, the last I heard Jenny was married with 3 kids.

  10. What about Bidget, where is he now? Assuming he's not Tom Cruise...

  11. He turned out to be an uptight phony military wanna-be. I think he serves summons now.

  12. Yeah but it’s great for hiding handguns to use against rival mafia members and corrupt police chiefs.

  13. Hey, listen, I want somebody good - and I mean very good - to plant that gun. I don't want my brother coming out of that toilet with just his dick in his hands, alright?

  14. I have them in my neighborhood out here in California, they're pretty cool and not as aggressive as you would think. They take dog sized poos though.

  15. Now I crave lingonberry schnapps! Luckily it's saturday and I actually have some at home. I'm not kidding, Im Scandinavian.

  16. Good catch! Prussia was pretty much gone by the start of WWII, doubt they even had forced air heating much less HVAC rituals.

  17. American Beauty was creepy when you sat down and really thought about it, which most of us didn't. We just accepted it as a excellent depiction of suburban ennui.

  18. Some people say there's a woman to blame, but I know, it's my own damn fault...

  19. Given most dogs don't live past 15 years "virtually every" would encompass probably more than 98%

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