News from FunnieNameGoesHere

  1. His son was on the committee that recommended impeachment.

  2. I have no idea what you’re talking about but Dan Patrick’s son is not only not on the committee, he’s not a member of the House.

  3. Someone else kindly corrected me without being an asshole about it and also gave the correct information instead of just bitching.

  4. Sorry, I didn’t mean it to come off that way. Re-reading it, I was being an asshole. Sorry.

  5. If you don't believe in open borders you can't call yourself libertarian

  6. Nobody believes in open borders. That’s a dog whistle. But some of us believe in rational immigration policies.

  7. Well, I disagree with them. But I do believe that our immigration policies need to include a guest worker program.

  8. “And to show how masculine I am, I’m going to stand outside a mall food court building a sign.”

  9. Black American males between the ages of 14 and 34 make up 1.9% of the population and commit 54% of all murders in the United States. Figure it out, smooth brain.

  10. Smooth brain? Alright, fuckwit. I see that you’re incapable of intelligent, civil discussion. Yes, there is some truth to the social media stats you cited, but there are other factors, nuances you obviously lack the ability to understand. Poor, under-educated black people killing each other in ghettos and mass shootings are different issues entirely. I won’t waste my time trying to explain it to you. Now run along before you’re late to your shift at the EZ Mart.

  11. Anyone else read that in Eric Cartman’s voice?!

  12. Nah, definitely Cartman. Chef wouldn’t be caught dead driving a Kia Soul.

  13. “The government you elect is the government you deserve.” — Thomas Jefferson.

  14. The reference still applies. I can only explain it. I can’t understand it for you.

  15. Gotta admit, though, mermaids and water people spreading perversion sounds like a lot of fun.

  16. Inadvertently explained why Republicans hate Latin Americans trying to come here.

  17. I don’t but I also don’t think it matters whether it is or isn’t. Don’t get me wrong — I’d prefer a Ferrari or a Lamborghini, which will probably appreciate in value — but it’s a beautiful car with similar performance for less than $100K for a Z51. What does it matter if it’s considered a “super car”?

  18. Do you have any idea how many handjobs I’m going to have to give because of this?

  19. The video was kinda funny. Then I turned on the sound and laughed until I nearly pissed myself!

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