News from ObviousXAppearance
My (21M) girlfriend (20F) was raped while in the process of cheating on me. I don't know what to do from here.
When you come across a feel-good thing.
- By - toohottooheavy
Small study suggests money can buy happiness — for households earning up to $123,000. In a six-month experiment, people who received cash transfers of $10,000 generally reported feeling happier than people who did not receive the payment.
Gives 1 month of ads-free browsing, r/lounge access, and %{coin_symbol}700 Coins a month.
- By - mossadnik
Found out my husband is secret millionaire and still charges me $500 rent every month
Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.
- By - toohottooheavy
God of War Ragnorök PS4 & PS5 (Digital Edition - US Region) Giveaway
When you come across a feel-good thing.
Give the gift of %{coin_symbol}250 Reddit Coins.
Listen, get educated, and get involved.
I'm catching the vibration
Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.
Thank you stranger. Shows the award.
- By - LP159
AITA for treating my adopted children the same as my biological child?
A golden splash of respect
- By - toohottooheavy
Seeking opinions on a potential incident
Staring into the abyss and it's staring right back
- By - mike213lbc
Please stop idealizing sex work
Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.
Thank you stranger. Shows the award.
When you come across a feel-good thing.
A glowing commendation for all to see
I'm in this with you.
I needed this today
Thank you stranger. Gives %{coin_symbol}100 Coins to both the author and the community.
OBJECTION!
You officially endorse and add your voice to the crowd.
- By - Few-Classic-690
I’ve seen people on this website MULTIPLE times claiming that getting divorced or being cheated on is worse than being raped.
It depends. Some women are resilient and it doesn’t effect them as much whereas others get long term PTSD. It’s not a contest. Rape is fucking horrible and so is infidelity
I’ve always found self report data on happiness to be flawed. I feel like it’s naive to think asking me from a scale of 1-7 if I’m happy or not is going to be consistently accurate.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with having a traditional wife. Personally it’s not my cup of tea as I prefer a more balanced approach, but I do think that some women shame others that want to be a traditional style wife. If someone wants to do that they are fully free to do so.
Essentially love is like a drug and once you get it it’s hard to stop taking it even if the harmful side effects kick in. You’re brain is literally wired to make a neurochemical bond and attachment to them. You need to understand that you can’t fix him… at all… and overcome your feelings and emotions to make the logical choice which is to break up with him
I’m curious to know why that is. Do you know?
You can only do a tax write off on vehicles that way over a certain amount. The G wagon is one of the few nice cars that fit that criteria while being expensive (the greater the expense the larger the write off)
Believe it or not there is no correlation between arousal and wetness, a shocking fact I learned from a few studies and books on the topic
Decreasing interest rates leading to decreased inflation😂😂😂
Breasts are not sexual. Saying so puts children in danger, blames women and is scientifically incorrect.
Breasts are almost certainly sexual, they have an indirect reproductive value as a marker of fertility. A beautiful face can lead to arousal despite not being directly reproductive. It’s the indirect aspect that links facial symmetry with health and fecundity that triggers sexual arousal.
I never said breasts can’t be sexualized ever. I said they are not a part of the reproductive system and obviously should never be used as a reason to justify unwanted sexual attention ever. No body part should be. But breasts get extra attention and are used to shame victims because people are stupidly uneducated even as adults and they are more easily visible.
I’m simply trying to be objective and I disagree with you saying that breasts aren’t sexual in any biological way. A women that wears certain clothing is going to be disproportionately targeted and looked at by men because she’s actively showing signs of fecundity that make men aroused. It’s not sheer coincidence. What ought is not the same as what is. Ideally no women would ever be objectified for their bodies, but that’s not how most men are programmed. It’s not a women’s fault for being objectified, but one way to reduce it is by wearing less revealing clothing. Ultimately, her body her choice. But either way, as a man you aren’t going to be that comfortable if your gf is sun-bathing nude because there will be a tendency towards jealousy as more eyes will be on her. Have you ever heard of mate-guarding; jealousy exists for a reason. But some men are more jealous than others. I understand where he’s coming from but I don’t think she should necessarily stop sun bathing nude.
“But the cheating didn’t even bother me. It wasn’t a turn on but it was kind of hot how this had to be kept a secret from me. Made me feel kind of stupid but also kind of important. Isn’t that a weird way to think about it?”
Non-monogamy often fails because people in open relationships tend to get very jealous even in the case of FWB. It’s important not to label yourself as non-monogamous because you are young and maybe haven’t met a person who you care enough about to be in a committed long term relationship. You also probably weren’t that mad because you cheated on her already so you couldn’t really be that mad lol
Just about to wrap up the first one, this would be a unlikely but very welcomed gift lol
There is a clear difference between a biological child and an adoptive one. Through kin selection, humans evolved preferences for biological kids. This doesn’t mean we have to treat adopted children poorly, but I understand your wife’s suggestion. Stand up your the adopted kids and try to compromise with her a bit
Story doesn’t add up. Sounds like rough sex. Compile evidence. Talk to her colleagues. They would definitely know about the fall. Ask about after work activities. Then confront her. Be ready to move on, if thing are as suspected
Sounds more like potential rape. But could just really be that she fell
The vast majority of personality assessments used in the workplace are not scientifically validated. It’s a big business but also confusing because legitimate personality metrics do exist. Even so I find it a highly discriminatory practice… it’s like ah your conscientiousness and extroversion levels are too low you don’t get the job lol
Piero Scaruffi is a critic who gets his social currency for shitting on everything
The ultimatum was extreme. He was an idiot for even presenting it and you stood firm which was the right thing to do. You can probably work over things with him if you want to, but you should also ask yourself if he’s really someone you want to be with in the future
FIFA 15 was solid
Once there was a kid that racially abused me and bullied me every other day. One day he pulled down my pants while yelling out a slur, so I punched him in the face with a combo. That’s the only time I’ve ever physically touched another person. Sometimes you don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes. At the same time what this girl did was just too far. I would be interested in hearing the backstory for more context, but even then I can’t really think of anything that would justify it besides something like sexual assault or something
Sex work is fine, it should just be regulated so that women aren’t exploited from it, especially these escort girls
Apologies don’t always have to be about apologizing, sometimes it’s just about letting the other person you feel for their situation. Getting your credit card and bills damaged sucks. Just say that you understand and that you are sorry and didn’t mean to. You can also not say anything but honestly I don’t think it’s worth it. Simple things like this should be moved on from fast. If you don’t apologize he might misinterpret it as you not having any sympathy for him.
This is a massive cope
For me graduation and kids see ghosts are good ways to start.
Many define cheating within two distinct categories: emotional and sexual. Sexual cheating in the research is usually strictly categorized as penetrative sex pretty much lol. Emotional cheating is a lot more common because it is so broad, it can include hand touching, texting an opposite sex partner in flirty ways, or going on a date. I believe cheating is viewed wrong because the brain evolved to detect signs of infidelity as a threat to long term stability and parental investment. One of the most important aspects of a relationship is commitment, once you cheat it suggests that you don’t respect the long term integrity of the relationship. It kind of suggests that you are disposable and that all the cheater needed to move on was a viable alternative. In fact often times people cheat as a way to get out of a relationship. I’ll answer the question about why men don’t care as much if a gf cheats with another women. From an evolutionary perspective this is not going to effect our reproductive success as males as much and it’s not exactly competition in the same way it would be if she cheats on a man. I can talk more about this if you want. However, most men will still hate something like that because it still is a massive threat towards commitment. There is a lot of individual variation in the perception of infidelity, believe or not about 1 in 4 couples actually forgive their partners for cheating.
Don’t do it if you are uncomfortable and feeling forced into it. There are plenty ways to deal with this. If she is that worried about it I don’t see why she can’t just get a tubal ligation. In fact this procedure is slightly more common than a male vasectomy. You could also just use birth control.
It’s unprofessional to say anything regarding sexual comments to a coworker, it doesn’t matter if it’s about any coworker or about their own partners - even if the coworker is considered a friend of their partners (being you). That being said, the fact he said so much out of pocket cringe stuff to your friend about you is…. So weird. So so weird. I’m the same way as you about all that so I’d be 🤢
I’m just going to be honest man, believe it or not guys do this kind of stuff a lot. Usually it’s meant in a joking way. I personally hate that kind of stuff and would never talk about my girlfriend to others like that. At the same time I just think it’s a cultural thing that’s been normalized a bit, kind of like locker room talk. It doesn’t mean that every guy is a creep or a weirdo. Locker room talk is gross, but I also understand from a psychological perspective why guys do it. I think a lot of it is to try to get validation from others, kind of like, “oh wow look at you buddy, you have an attractive girlfriend and an active sex life you pass our test of manliness” lol. Some people have a very crude definition of what being a man is and it’s often revolves around things like that. It’s not entirely insecurity, it’s insecurity reinforced by cultural norms.
I try to not listen to gossip too much, often things get fabricated. If I were you I would talk to him and make him address the comments he made. But yes from the looks of it it does seem kind of strange that he said those things. Should you break up with him over it? If that’s the only issue you’ve had in the relationship then I would say no. He obviously is very sexually attracted to you and seems to want to express that to an external outlet. However, if you think he is with you purely for a sexual element then you should move on.