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And the Greatest of These is Love

When you follow your heart, love is the answer

My valentine makes my heart beat out of my chest.

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  1. My heart would break…there would be a hole in my life that nothing or no one could fill…..the family would struggle because we would all blame ourselves…how could we let our beautiful, wonderful special child think their life was so worthless that we would not be devastated…..what did we need to do or say to make sure they know how much we love them.

  2. Cognitive therapy may work for you….the poster said that she did a lot of therapy, there are many different approaches, you might like to ask her what approach she took to therapy, get some detail and investigate the therapy approach. Often reading self help books, blogs etc can get your thinking moving in the right direction. You can do the same as this poster, but it will take time, energy effort and focus…..but you deserve to recover….and you deserve to be well….so you are worth the investment

  3. your childhood was not normal…there is no real thing as normal… but your parents did not behave in the ways we expect parents to behave, so there is no obligation on you to behave in the way we expect adult children to behave. I expect my son to forgive me because I forgot to pick him up from school one day…i don’t expect you to forgive your parents for abusing you….it’s not the same thing.

  4. Have you got a major birthday or wedding anniversary coming up soon?

  5. I love it when kids know if they move in a certain way they are going to get kisses….when we can gift all our children kisses and love just because they look up and smile..I know we will be moving to the right place as a society…I think the double check just to make certain his kiss theory was correct is the best part….love and kisses are always the right answer🥰💕

  6. The point of a wedding..imho..is that you are inviting your friends and family to come together to bear witness to your commitment and to do all they can to support the two of you to honour that commitment.

  7. Kudos for you for asking..I can only speak from my experience….I am 55 and have had three long term relationships of significance and many more experiences of dating….yes I am single🙃

  8. I am not sure why you made this comment. Unless you are a wheelchair user yourself. Are you suggesting that people who use wheelchairs to mobilise have such a low quality of life that they would be better of dead?

  9. the Gottman institute talks about the four horseman of a doomed marriage

  10. Just sending love…that sounds so very difficult

  11. No…I know lots of men who don’t..no matter how much temptation is put in front of them, I only know a handful who have cheated….don’t believe him….

  12. No….no….no….you are 26 years older than her….you are the adult and the grown up..she is barely out of being a child. imagine meeting her parents and her friendship group…play the tape forward…it doesn’t look to pretty….

  13. This was written by Michelle Weiner Davis's divorce busting 180 list. I figured I'd share in case anyone hasn't seen it, admittedly this list was posted by another member of the community some time ago. I am just a firm believer in this approach…you need to change and change quickly…..you need to surprise her and make her question what is happening …..

  14. I am wading into this conversation to support your perspective, drugs in my country are still illegal, I can understand why you would not want an intoxicated person looking after your children, ican understand why you don’t want a relationship with someone who needs to get high every day to cope with life.

  15. I'll be 58 next month, my wife would have been 60. She collapsed here at home and passed away a year and a half ago. Our house is paid, her new car was already paid off, our other two vehicles paid for. We built a large shed in the back, all new windows in the house, replaced the siding, insulated the house, put decks on the front and back of the house, put a 32 foot carport down the length of the house. Every summer I had some major renovation project planned. Her and I did all the work while we worked full time jobs. We are not high wage earners, but did what we needed. Early in the spring right through the fall her and I did our home improvement projects. Never really took vacations, as we would do that later, or when we retire. Sorry, I am rambling on, don't know what my point was really. Just that life is short and unpredictable. Please enjoy what you can when you can. I would like to add, anyone reading this, please don't upvote me or give any awards. It seems that whenever I talk of my feelings or wife's death I get more attention than wanted. I am not here for karma. Thanks.

  16. I think we upvote to say we agree with the words or thoughts in the post…when you get upvoted for expressing your feelings about the loss of your wife and sharing the profound impact that had on how you now view life, people are saying, thank you for sharing BUT it also draws the attention to your post because other people may just need to read what you have to say..to learn from your experience.

  17. ?from personal experience I learnt a lot about myself, and made lots of changes to myself….I didn’t stay married, because he had already checked out, but I definitely became a better version of me, one I like a lot.

  18. I think lots of people do…not just a money thing, but a companionship, support, babysitting, counselling…there are a host of reasons people move back to their parents home. For many the parents and the divorced family member get a lot out of the arrangement, multi generational families are a often a hugely succesful unit.

  19. So…..enquiring minds need to know…did you get the dress 😊

  20. For years people have been saying to me…you are always on a diet, why dont you just eat normally

  21. Stop drinking…is a Reddit sub ….very good place to get support to get sober

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