News from shavemejesus



Before the God thing

Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.

Thank you stranger. Shows the award.

When you come across a feel-good thing.

A glowing commendation for all to see

Stop, chill, relax

A golden splash of respect

A glittering stamp for a feel-good thing

Thank you stranger. Gives %{coin_symbol}100 Coins to both the author and the community.

Did somebody say 'Murica?

Are you being serious right now?

Gives 100 Reddit Coins and a week of r/lounge access and ad-free browsing.

I needed this today

Let's sip to good health and good company






WTF???

Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.

Thank you stranger. Shows the award.

When you come across a feel-good thing.

A glowing commendation for all to see



Blursed handshake

Thank you stranger. Shows the award.

When you come across a feel-good thing.

Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.









NSFW - The future of sex toys

Thank you stranger. Shows the award.

When you come across a feel-good thing.

Can't stop seeing stars

I don't need it, I don't even necessarily want it, but I've got some cash to burn so I'm gonna get it.

Boldly go where we haven't been in a long, long time.

*Lowers face into palm*

Shows the Silver Award... and that's it.









  1. The capitalized words indicate which words should be emphasized, just like I remember reciting it in school.

  2. Makes me want to start a brewery called “the devils craft” and have all demon named beers. Huge sales and events during Halloween and solstices. Eclipse sales, full moon events… ritual brewing… The theatrical flavor would be awesome

  3. Shiiiii, I don't pay debt collectors who have legitimate claims.

  4. I had a friend that died of cystic fibrosis 11 years ago. He was 42 at the time and had never paid a penny of his college loans back. He said he knew he would never live long enough for it to matter. When he died he still owed $67,000.

  5. Fuck 'em. I hope your friend had a good life otherwise.

  6. He spent three summers living in a VW bus and following the Grateful Dead around the country in the late 80s. Lived in the Virgin Islands after the cruise ship he worked on fired him for having CF. Got to work with people like Pete Townshend, Van Morrison and Yoko in his career as an audio engineer.

  7. Jesus was all about tricking people with fake money.

  8. Selfish people, many of whom run our government, only want to help themselves.

  9. Yeah it's weird, I wonder if maybe guns aren't the direct issue and maybe serious, widespread mental health issues have actually been the culprit all along.

  10. Remember when I said I'd kill you last? I lied!

  11. You’ll have to excuse my friend. He’s dead tired.

  12. Postal inspectors do not mess around.

  13. Don’t let your employees fuck children, World tells Pope.

  14. The look on Bowie’s face after the dude says that stupid shit about pandering to middle America’s fear of black people — pure gold.

  15. I'm not a Trump fan, but do you really think 300k+ Americans wouldn't have died from covid if Trump wasn't president? Covid hit every major nation hard at some point. Is the leader of every one of those nations at fault for their lives lost as much as Trump is at fault for American lives lost?

  16. Is Casey Affleck’s character from Drowning Mona in a Christmas movie now?

  17. Seriously fuck that guy. I've never understood why people idolize others..... Like damn.... Idolize yourself fam

  18. Probably cause he smoked weed with Joe rogan. He's such a massive asshole when you actually learn about how he acts. And who the fuck names their kid after a fucking plane

  19. We had someone who idolizes himself. There was a big thing about it on January 6th.

  20. That’s just what Greek women told Greek men to make them feel better.

  21. I wish I owned a restaurant just so I could offer this kid and his family free lifetime meals. It won’t end racism but every little bit of kind ness helps.

  22. They look like Roger Daltrey and Roger’s uglier half brother.

  23. He’s starting to get that Phil Spector look about him.

  24. Love this comment for some reason, reminds me of a standardized test writing prompt.

  25. In 500 words or less, describe how you would react to such a phenomenon and how you think the reactions of your peers would differ from your own.

  26. The only problem with that is they will consistently under staff the store and you will be waiting for hours to get your spatula.

  27. Right? As cool as the whole Service Merchandise conveyor thing was, I have distinct childhood memories of standing there and waiting for what seemed like an eternity for our items to come through the flaps.

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