One of my friends walked in on her son jacking off. She explained to him that there there was nothing wrong with it but maybe he could be more private about it In the future. He started announcing "I'm going for some private time!" every time he went for a spank. Edit: I guess I should have mentioned that he was in his bedroom with the door open.
Growing up, I always had to lock my door. Even if I'm just chilling. My one of my parents can't knock, and the other kick the door like it owes him money.
If it makes you feel any better, I use my detachable shower head on my hair instead of the normal shower head. I have thick hair and it makes it easier to get the shampoo out.
My husband always announces his showers. He tells us all when he's going to go take a shit too. I've been trying to discourage that habit since 1997, but no luck so far.
I announce my bathroom visits too. It’s left over from when I lived with only 1 bathroom and 5 people. It’s also a way to make sure no one comes looking for me. My husband also announces his bathroom visits with a lot more detail than I do.
I was married for 2-3 years before my wife pointed out that I always told her where I was going when I left the room. It was such a normal part of life that I didn't even realize I was doing it, let alone that it wasn't what everyone did.
My family as well. Could be due to having one bathroom in a household of eight people though, so it was like a warning that it was everyone's last chance for the bathroom for a while.
Here too sometimes. Not all the time, but usually if I shower in the evening, so my parents don't go using the warm water to wash the pan and make my shower cold.
If it makes you feel better, one time I was in my shower using the detachable shower head and my dad banged on the wall and yelled “HEY YOU’RE WASTING WATER!” right as I was climaxing. It was unfortunate 😂 so embarrassing I still cringe thinking about it
I moved back home after undergrad. It was supposed to be for just a few months to see where I’d be moving for grad school, but then COVID hit and I was there for a year and a half. Anyways, I’m having fun with my vibrator one night after I told my mom that I was going to bed, and this woman bursts into my room without knocking just to tell me that she loves me. She typically always knocked and never bothered me after I went to bed in case I was already asleep, but I was panicking to cover myself and hide my vibrator😅
I have a similar story. I was about 15ish. I thought I was clever and would turn on the cold water of the shower and sit on the toilet and masturbate. You know, to conserve the hot water for when I actually went into the shower. Well one day my step dad decided he needed to use the toilet really bad. He tried to barge in and I stupidly forgot to lock the door. The toilet is close enough to the door that if you were sitting in the toilet, the door would be obstructed by your leg. Dude was drunk when he tried barging in. He slammed into my leg and I was horrified. He was confused at first until he realized what I had been doing. He even was yelling at me threw the crack that I needed to get off the toilet. To make matters worse he would knock on the door every time I went to shower. Mocking me and make crude jokes threw the door. I hated his guts before that incident. Luckily I'm not in communication with him anymore.
I hate it when someone literally bangs the door like it's a fucking house door and say something like "ARE YOU THERE FOR MUCH LONGER??1?1?1?1" while I'm doing my business.
For me it's always one of the damn kids! Why they feel the need to walk into the bathroom while I'm showing I have no idea. They also leave the damn door open letting out the hot air. That sucks even if I'm not fapping.
One of my strategies is to cup water in my hand every so often and drop it so it makes a loud noise and sounds like I’m washing my hair or something. It’s those long gaps of just running water and no splashies that make people on the outside suspicious. 😂
Lol what did you do? And just to make it equal with an embarrassing story haha. One time my mom barged in and started talking to me RIGHT as I was having an orgasm in my bed. Luckily I was under my blanket and had my back turned to her, and I just pretended to be sleeping.
As a dad, I can say I have yelled about lights, doors left open, food containers not closed properly, messes left on every surface, and the famous socks smashed into the couch.
My mom used to walk in on me all the time and I would be in the floor of the shower, she’d ask what I was doing and I said “I like sitting to shave my legs”.. we’re pretty close now so I asked her if she ever figured me out and she really thought I was just a weirdo who sat to shave. Lmao
As a mum, who really enjoys the showerhead, I would also laugh and forget about it instantly. Why do teenagers forget that we do the exact same stuff, also we have way more dirty, adventurous and frequent sex too.
If it makes you feel better I got a strap on and a vibrator delivered to my parents address (because in my neighborhood people steal packages) and my mom opened the box. She laughed and said “reminds me of the old days”.
Reminds me when I was living in dorms at Uni - one of the buddies taught our foreign friend that "to beat one off" was the same as "hitting the sack", i.e. go to bed.
My grad advisor was on sabbatical in England and a non-native English speaker who was a new visiting professor had gone to the curry mile and it didn't sit well with him. For some reason he felt the need to tell people that the curry had given him diarrhea, but when he told my advisor he said "gonorrhea". My advisor DIDN'T CORRECT HIM and this guy went around telling everyone in the department that he "went to the curry mile and got gonorrhea" 🤦♀️
I had a friend in college who would routinely announce to the room that he was heading home to "spit one out" before bed. Watching new people slowly realize what he meant was pretty entertaining...also gross.
Honestly, I'm a new parent but 100% this is what I would say in those shoes. The kid is 21. We are all human with human urges, you do you boo. Biology should never be taboo.
Holy shit that brought back a memory of one of the most Fucked up movies I’ve ever seen. Happiness (1998ish). A list actors on a low budget film, but wow! That end scene tho…
I’m dying!! I f (50) will never forget the day I went to take a shower and realized that my then 15 yr old daughter had left the shower head in “happy” mode.
We had a similar thing with the superintendent at our work, we would joke about how it would be embarrassing to accidentally call him the Super Nintendo. I did exactly that at a safety conference when I introduced him to a whole audience of people. There was laughter, but he was not impressed...
As a parent of 2 kids , I think they would be mortified if they knew that parents know way more than they think. Your parents would have chuckled and thought no more of it.
As a preteen I thought it was the most inconspicuous thing in the world to lock myself in the bathroom for long periods of time without bathing. Now that I'm in my 20s I realize how much stuff you do growing up that you only think you're getting away with.
We once 'inadvertently' received a dildo from Ally Express while our oldest daughter (24) was visiting. After we all had a good laugh, she was the first to say she'd take it off our hands if we didn't want it. So it's hers now 🙃
Well, fuck me. I was like, 12, when my mom found my vibrating PEN that would make squiggly lines. She knocked to tell me some dude was here w a new mattress, ripped the comforter off the bed, found said pen and I about died as they both saw it and I fumbled around.
As a parent, I'd have laughed my ass off and not cared. I have a 13 year old son who takes long showers and has started sleeping with his door closed etc... We all know what he's doing, it's natural and I'm sure your parents know that you, a human being do it too.
Not as bad when my mom cleaned my room as a teen and found my porn printouts I had in a secret folder to look at while doing the deed. That day she found out my kinks and still jokes about it.
The detachable shower head has satisfied more men and wemon than anything on the planet. I think we all know that if your spending more than 15 minutes in the shower then something extra curricular is going on in there.
Really. I mean I as depraved as the rest of us. I honestly just sit in there 90% of the time and continually turn the water hotter seeing how much i can take, then let my muscles melt and maybe do some stretches and just relax.
Ever heard the story of the young lad who woke up one morning, realised he had some time before he had to get up for school and decided to have himself a nice wank? So he puts some music on with his headphones and closes his eyes and waxes his dolphin. But when he’s finished and opens his eyes again he sees that there’s now a cup of tea and a digestive biscuit sitting on his bedside table
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Well we all know what your plans are. Have fun.
I just told my boyfriend I wanted a detachable shower head he said no because I'm too much of a pervert XD
"We stand in the shoulders of giants"
Well then, don't say something you might regret.
I don't know why but when you said detachable showerhead I was thinking of a wireless shower head lmfao
I've always had a detachable shower head, but same. Tihi
One of my friends walked in on her son jacking off. She explained to him that there there was nothing wrong with it but maybe he could be more private about it In the future. He started announcing "I'm going for some private time!" every time he went for a spank. Edit: I guess I should have mentioned that he was in his bedroom with the door open.
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At least they know if he becomes addicted xD
ummm where tf was he doing it?? in the kitchen?????
Hey ma!! I'm going to go play a round of bathroom whack-a-mole..... Here's your headphones.
Growing up, I always had to lock my door. Even if I'm just chilling. My one of my parents can't knock, and the other kick the door like it owes him money.
Or she could just knock before entering like a normal person does.
Whelp I now just learned something I didn't need to know about why my sister never put detachable shower head back
If it makes you feel any better, I use my detachable shower head on my hair instead of the normal shower head. I have thick hair and it makes it easier to get the shampoo out.
Same, i didn't realize it
Probably just washing / rinsing hair
what a rookie mistake lmao
I always leave the shower head hanging so the water can drain out of the hanging middle bit.
On the plus side its all very clean. No snail trails.
My family also announced when they'd go take a shower.
I thought that was normal... maybe not if you have seven showers but with one announcing allows people to plan ahead their shower usage.
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My husband always announces his showers. He tells us all when he's going to go take a shit too. I've been trying to discourage that habit since 1997, but no luck so far.
Same. I always thought was more of a "if you need to poop do it now, before I officially occupy the bathroom for shower time"
I definitely read this as if your whole family showers together.
I announce my bathroom visits too. It’s left over from when I lived with only 1 bathroom and 5 people. It’s also a way to make sure no one comes looking for me. My husband also announces his bathroom visits with a lot more detail than I do.
We had to do this because turning on any tap in the house made the shower either freezing cold or scolding hot
I announce when I’m gona take a shit or shower. You’re not gona be able to use the bathroom for a while either way so get in before I do.
I was married for 2-3 years before my wife pointed out that I always told her where I was going when I left the room. It was such a normal part of life that I didn't even realize I was doing it, let alone that it wasn't what everyone did.
My family as well. Could be due to having one bathroom in a household of eight people though, so it was like a warning that it was everyone's last chance for the bathroom for a while.
This is a pretty common habit when you're sharing a bathroom. Especially if you're living in a place with a single one.
Don't want someone deciding to start laundry or dishes while you are in there.
Here too sometimes. Not all the time, but usually if I shower in the evening, so my parents don't go using the warm water to wash the pan and make my shower cold.
Same. I think it's normal, especially if you're a close family. Except for us it's a veiled threat not to use water... or else! lol
If it makes you feel better, one time I was in my shower using the detachable shower head and my dad banged on the wall and yelled “HEY YOU’RE WASTING WATER!” right as I was climaxing. It was unfortunate 😂 so embarrassing I still cringe thinking about it
Pretty awkward, similar situation (not shower) but it was my mom calling me for dinner
Is that more or less embarrassing than having your SO's mom see you come out of the bedroom and says "oh, a quickie"
Omg are you me? Lmao
I moved back home after undergrad. It was supposed to be for just a few months to see where I’d be moving for grad school, but then COVID hit and I was there for a year and a half. Anyways, I’m having fun with my vibrator one night after I told my mom that I was going to bed, and this woman bursts into my room without knocking just to tell me that she loves me. She typically always knocked and never bothered me after I went to bed in case I was already asleep, but I was panicking to cover myself and hide my vibrator😅
That sounds like one of those fun memories that pops into your head sometimes during solo fun times and ruins it.
I have a similar story. I was about 15ish. I thought I was clever and would turn on the cold water of the shower and sit on the toilet and masturbate. You know, to conserve the hot water for when I actually went into the shower. Well one day my step dad decided he needed to use the toilet really bad. He tried to barge in and I stupidly forgot to lock the door. The toilet is close enough to the door that if you were sitting in the toilet, the door would be obstructed by your leg. Dude was drunk when he tried barging in. He slammed into my leg and I was horrified. He was confused at first until he realized what I had been doing. He even was yelling at me threw the crack that I needed to get off the toilet. To make matters worse he would knock on the door every time I went to shower. Mocking me and make crude jokes threw the door. I hated his guts before that incident. Luckily I'm not in communication with him anymore.
I hate it when someone literally bangs the door like it's a fucking house door and say something like "ARE YOU THERE FOR MUCH LONGER??1?1?1?1" while I'm doing my business.
For me it's always one of the damn kids! Why they feel the need to walk into the bathroom while I'm showing I have no idea. They also leave the damn door open letting out the hot air. That sucks even if I'm not fapping.
"Dad, don't talk about my boyfriend like that!"
oh no, the voice of anyone you know of and don't wanna think of sexually - right before orgasm is TRAUMATIC.
When daddy issues give you a shower kink
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One of my strategies is to cup water in my hand every so often and drop it so it makes a loud noise and sounds like I’m washing my hair or something. It’s those long gaps of just running water and no splashies that make people on the outside suspicious. 😂
I can beat that.
Well you didn't exactly announce what you were masturbating like op....so he probably just thought you were taking a long shower haha
Lol what did you do? And just to make it equal with an embarrassing story haha. One time my mom barged in and started talking to me RIGHT as I was having an orgasm in my bed. Luckily I was under my blanket and had my back turned to her, and I just pretended to be sleeping.
As a dad, I can say I have yelled about lights, doors left open, food containers not closed properly, messes left on every surface, and the famous socks smashed into the couch.
Just an FYI. No matter what anyone tells you it's never wasting water if you're masterbating...
Yeah...this kind if happened to me too. I was on the bathroom floor and my dad banged on it right when I was climaxing. Instantly killed it.
Thanks for the tip! Kids are still young, but I'm an awesome dad. I'll start doing this in a few years.
He was just reminding you to re-hydrate after.
My mom used to walk in on me all the time and I would be in the floor of the shower, she’d ask what I was doing and I said “I like sitting to shave my legs”.. we’re pretty close now so I asked her if she ever figured me out and she really thought I was just a weirdo who sat to shave. Lmao
fuck this unlocked a memory of my dad doing the EXACT same thing
Wait until the day the kids are banging on the door while in there with ones partner
"Hey we gotta go! Are you coming or not!?"
Me with my bidet lol
Lol such a dad thing to do
Reminds me of
lmao can relate XD
Your parents masturbated, they were young too once. They've also wiped your butt.
Correction: They are still masturbating.
Hahahaha “they’ve also wiped your butt”. Something you’ll get to do for them in the future!!!
As a mum, who really enjoys the showerhead, I would also laugh and forget about it instantly. Why do teenagers forget that we do the exact same stuff, also we have way more dirty, adventurous and frequent sex too.
Whenever things get sexually awkward, just remember, your parents FUCKED you into existence!
Mom laughed. Dad said “let’s talk about something else.”
If it makes you feel better I got a strap on and a vibrator delivered to my parents address (because in my neighborhood people steal packages) and my mom opened the box. She laughed and said “reminds me of the old days”.
Could be worse. Your mom could have yelled out “Honey! It’s here!” and had your Dad come running.
Wait a minute. Your mom's bi or your dad got pegged?
Reminds me when I was living in dorms at Uni - one of the buddies taught our foreign friend that "to beat one off" was the same as "hitting the sack", i.e. go to bed.
Did they ever figure it out?
My grad advisor was on sabbatical in England and a non-native English speaker who was a new visiting professor had gone to the curry mile and it didn't sit well with him. For some reason he felt the need to tell people that the curry had given him diarrhea, but when he told my advisor he said "gonorrhea". My advisor DIDN'T CORRECT HIM and this guy went around telling everyone in the department that he "went to the curry mile and got gonorrhea" 🤦♀️
That's the kind of payoff that I live for
I had a friend in college who would routinely announce to the room that he was heading home to "spit one out" before bed. Watching new people slowly realize what he meant was pretty entertaining...also gross.
Thank God your parents didn't say "ok, have fun" on a reflex
or, "try the pulse setting, it's amazing"
I say this to my kids when ever they announce they are leaving the room. "I'm going to get a drink"
No, this would have been the perfect answer!
My mom caught me masturbating and then I get a text a few minutes later “glad to know you’re normal”… I was mortified.
Honestly, I'm a new parent but 100% this is what I would say in those shoes. The kid is 21. We are all human with human urges, you do you boo. Biology should never be taboo.
This reminds me of how my Grandma would say “Don’t get wet” when someone announced they were getting in the shower
"Okay, let us know if you need help!"
If I was you I'd make sure to do it without the shower on, and just loud enough to be heard in the background without making too much noise.
A true cumming of age story
"Mom, dad. I've come." Fucking got me holy shit that's peak comedy
"I've come and now I must go". Then leave the room
I fully endorse this plan
-Elaborate on that.
Tell me you didn’t understand the method of masturbation without telling me
Bahahah I’d give you an award if I could
The shower has to be on. Do you think she shoves it inside her? Poor guy.
Holy shit that brought back a memory of one of the most Fucked up movies I’ve ever seen. Happiness (1998ish). A list actors on a low budget film, but wow! That end scene tho…
Just go and be extra loud. "Oh, PANTENE!! Such, GOOD, SHAMPOO! OH!"
Oh god, body wash!! Wait, don’t scrub there… No…. Stop… moaning Oh goodness, I’m gonna get CLEEEEEEEAN
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Lol early 2000's herbal essence commercial flashback right there.
Ahh yes daddy pantene fuck me harder
I’m dying!! I f (50) will never forget the day I went to take a shower and realized that my then 15 yr old daughter had left the shower head in “happy” mode.
And what setting is “happy mode” 🤔 for…”research purposes I mean”
To be fair I have as a male used every shower head setting there is just because they all feel nice on my head/back during different times.
Eh, sometimes I use the happy mode to rinse off hair and dirty spots in the tub.
Omg I always wondered what the pulse setting was for 🤣🤣
Hm odd that you are 21 in this post but 26 in your AITA post that got deleted…
This sub needs to crack down on all these time travelers.
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And also odd that she was 30 in another post...
Make sure to update us later!
We had a similar thing with the superintendent at our work, we would joke about how it would be embarrassing to accidentally call him the Super Nintendo. I did exactly that at a safety conference when I introduced him to a whole audience of people. There was laughter, but he was not impressed...
As a parent of 2 kids , I think they would be mortified if they knew that parents know way more than they think. Your parents would have chuckled and thought no more of it.
As a preteen I thought it was the most inconspicuous thing in the world to lock myself in the bathroom for long periods of time without bathing. Now that I'm in my 20s I realize how much stuff you do growing up that you only think you're getting away with.
Your parents already knew. They have sex lives too, and had a lot of years to get comfortable and develop a sense of humor about it.
It's not even sex. No chance of STDs or getting pregnant. Just self exploration.
I’m sure you’re more embarrassed then they are. Guess what, they masturbate too.
Isn't it weird that you were 30 22 days ago, but now you're 21?
What if using shower head gave her the ability to age shift?
I dread the day reddit comments just become a bunch of gifs
We once 'inadvertently' received a dildo from Ally Express while our oldest daughter (24) was visiting. After we all had a good laugh, she was the first to say she'd take it off our hands if we didn't want it. So it's hers now 🙃
That’s… ummm… I don’t know how I’d feel about that…
Definitely should have still showered.
Good luck with all the unsolicited DM's.
Well, they said they’re 26 in another post so idk if this is real lol
Ah the old Freudian slip of the tongue
The only problem will be finding a better boyfriend than that showerhead I guess.
Back when I was a teen, the family shower head was my fuckin husband
Well, fuck me. I was like, 12, when my mom found my vibrating PEN that would make squiggly lines. She knocked to tell me some dude was here w a new mattress, ripped the comforter off the bed, found said pen and I about died as they both saw it and I fumbled around.
Say it was a tik tok challenge or something, to fuck with parents. So many easy ways out of this.
If it makes you feel better, I got to see my sister 9 months before everyone else! Not an exciting day for 4 y/o me.
Just don't get stuck and ask for help.
How? We you not a 30f 22 days ago?
Why do you claim to be 21 when you were 30 in another post?
Just looked. It’s in a circlejerk sub so maybe she was just mocking someone?
You've got the order wrong. She aged 9 years when she was too embarrassed to fap her flaps.
It’s literally a parody sub, there’s a link to the source of the post she’s jerking
“I told you not to bother me when I’m vacuuming my room!”
So you say you're 21 here, but your post history says 30. Nice karma story lady.
when your brain has auto-correct and gives you the wrong word at the wrong time
I know not all familiar are the same but I bet they just found it hilarious and might even tease you about it.
Just put the damn shower head back up when your done. Its all we ask.
I'm a parent. Think nothing of it. We masturbate/ed. We know all the tricks as well. We all have biological urges, & is healthy & normal.
They already knew. The water hitting the floor is going to sound noticeably different compared to normal use.
As a parent, I'd have laughed my ass off and not cared. I have a 13 year old son who takes long showers and has started sleeping with his door closed etc... We all know what he's doing, it's natural and I'm sure your parents know that you, a human being do it too.
For people upvoting this to eternity, look at OPs profile, she is obviously lying (about her age too), in her previous post she says she is 30.
Not as bad when my mom cleaned my room as a teen and found my porn printouts I had in a secret folder to look at while doing the deed. That day she found out my kinks and still jokes about it.
Would you mind telling me how you can be age 30 and 21 at the same time ?
Harry Potter and that necklace that can turn back time amirite?
This is pretty good. I didn’t know people use it like that. I thought it was just something from the movies.
Adorable
You are a jewel. No sarcasm intended.
I also announce when I'm gonna shower
My "bedroom" was the couch in the living room. My brother had his own room, my sister had her own room. Middle child syndrome here!
When I was a wee lad, we were accustomed to ask our parents if we can go to the bathroom.
The detachable shower head has satisfied more men and wemon than anything on the planet. I think we all know that if your spending more than 15 minutes in the shower then something extra curricular is going on in there.
Really. I mean I as depraved as the rest of us. I honestly just sit in there 90% of the time and continually turn the water hotter seeing how much i can take, then let my muscles melt and maybe do some stretches and just relax.
I feel sorry for your inbox
Ever heard the story of the young lad who woke up one morning, realised he had some time before he had to get up for school and decided to have himself a nice wank? So he puts some music on with his headphones and closes his eyes and waxes his dolphin. But when he’s finished and opens his eyes again he sees that there’s now a cup of tea and a digestive biscuit sitting on his bedside table
They already knew what you did on those "long showers"... don't kid yourself...
Hey, you have to rub one out, you have to rub one out. It happens. Nothing to be ashamed of.
You were just a 30F 23 days ago? Your showerhead must be a fountain of youth
Parent here...
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Dum dum that was a copy paste from another sub
Do not pass go, go direct to horny jail
Why are you lying? Lmao you have another post saying your 30. Weird as shit
This person got banned from AITA recently if you check her account
Your previous post says you're (30f). So which is it, are you 21 or 30? Or a 25 year old guy?
She says 21 here another post says 30. Upvote farmer?
*he says 21
In your other post you said you were 30(F), which is it?
its a circlejerk sub about skincare
Cool story bro.
Hate to break it to you, but they already know what you're doing in the shower for that long.
10 minutes? I doubt it. How long are your showers??
bruh i take like 40 minute showers and don't masturbate. i'm just head empty no thoughts in there
And… you’re lying.
Why do you think so?
Good one
“Accidentally”
10 minutes tops? Is that a fast orgasm for clitoris class people?
Can we get an update?
Wait, so are you 21f, or 30f? Your post history claims both.
One of your other posts says you're a 30F not 21F sooooo
TIL why women like to take showers at my place when they come over.
People get embarrassed to easily if I want my parents out of my room I just tell them I’m masturbating and it works
I just told them that.
You know your parents masturbate and have sex right? They will have had a bit of a laugh about it but they love you so it’s not a big deal mate.
This sounds like it was written by a man. Not buying it
"She" also posted that she was 30 earlier this month