Being child free has become a guise for hating children/parents

  1. That's what happens to all subreddits created for venting. At first it's just venting and support, then inevitably the cretins move in and take over.

  2. Let's reach peak irony and create a sub venting about reddit. Once the cretins move in, they will be hating the very outlet they complain on.

  3. It's the problem with echo chambers. Almost every subreddit that isn't just about a TV show or something ends up turning into a circlejerk where one view of the world drowns out everything else. Personally I've found that Reddit is becoming more and more pleasant for me as I cull certain subs and just stick mostly to entertainment discussion.

  4. This is why I think all subreddits created to be against something are complete shit. I’ve never seen one that was actually reasonable even if I agreed with the premise of it.

  5. I literally got banned from that sub because I commented on a post that was bitching about St. Jude existing and I was like "Imagine being the type of person to see an ad for a charity for children with literal CANCER and thinking 'what makes them so special"

  6. Idk, it's a curious part of most cultures that we value a life that's barely started over one that's more developed and contributing to society.

  7. Same. I am child free because I feel my mental and financial status would not be good for a mother, but I love kids and love having them around. I can't stand the "ew, crouch goblin I hate you" stance people take so openly sometimes.

  8. I'm cool with people being child free. Having grown up in fostercare I firmly believe not everyone should be parents.

  9. Wow really?? That just sucks. Why did people give you shit? I’ve had one co worker, who was already salty and enjoys being negative (his Facebook bio says “I hate everything”) give me shit if I ever mentioned wanting to have children, saying how I must have sooooo much extra money that I’m willing to throw it away on the costs of having a child. First of all, let’s just talk about how my wallet was none of his damn business.

  10. It's neither hate nor disdain. Imagine your friend got into crossfit and would only talk about crossfit. People geniuenly don't care, aren't interested and are annoyed by the constant nagging.

  11. People who exist in mostly online spaces are usually annoying at best, hateful at worst. Most have been rejected by real life people for being unpleasant to be around, or they have a lot of mental health challenges/personality disorders.

  12. Yes and we are awesome for it. The extra cash, the freedom to do whatever we want, the no responsibilities, the being able to sleep in whenever and nap whenever...

  13. I think what people hate about kids is how draining they can be around. I don't hate kids themselves, but I hate the loud noises they make, the screeches, the yelling or screaming, the excessive crying.. the attention seeking.

  14. I’m childfree and love kids, but I noticed in a FB group I was once in, people were damn near murderous towards children. After having questioned why people were this angry about kids, I was suspended from posting or commenting for 24 hours, I think. So I left the group. It’s kind of insane..

  15. I think people on childfree are like that cuz they cant have children either due to mental ilness, relationship issues, being undesirable, economic reasons and lash out at normal people having children.

  16. I see that on TikTok too, some of these people literally express violent thoughts in regards to kids being kids. I remember seeing a TikTok where this 3 year old spilled milk because he dropped a hot cocoa bomb too high, and people were saying that they’d beat the child if they were there. It’s one thing to not want kids, but it’s way out of line to express violent thoughts about kids because you hate them.

  17. Hey, you don’t want kids? That’s fine. That’s your choice. Better to not have them, then to have them, hate them and have your kids grow up miserable.

  18. Too late to tell that to my mom. Well, I blame society who kept telling her "you have to have kids you'll love it you're a woman!" Let me tell you she did not.

  19. People with kids dislike parents that don't parent as well, because although there are times that shit happens, it's not that hard to throw your kid over shoulder and go have a chat or call it a day. 🙄

  20. It’s unreasonable to ask children to be reasonable, specially toddlers. Toddlers cannot control their emotions.

  21. I hear this all the time. And it makes sense. But I rarely see these “children running wild while parents do fuck all about it” in the real world. Like I can’t think of a single instance in the last few years. What I can think of multiple examples of in the last 2 or so years is assholes berating mothers in a restaurant because her baby cried and she couldn’t console him under a minute. I’ve seen 20-somethings laughing loudly at kids falling because kids have stupid little qtip bodies and fall a lot. I have seen parents being sooo over the top apologetic when they have to cancel plans with friends because they’re kids are sick or upset or whatever it may be. I have seen so much belittling and shaming and openly accepted bullying toward parents and they’re FUCKING KIDS by adults who claim to be too mature for this shit. Sorry your nosy aunts ask when you’re having babies or you get less sympathy at work for time off. If you think either of these things means you’ve somehow earned the right to be a shithead maybe your parents didn’t do so hot and you shouldn’t be so harsh towards others.

  22. As a mom of a 4 & a half month old, I always wanted to be a mother & I already knew the difficult aspects behind it. But I deff don’t think I deserve a medal for being able to do what other women have done since the beginning of time.

  23. Also there are literal parents who hate kids yet still have them, so at least the child free ones dont hurt actual kids in the process and are just venting online

  24. Wow! Just yesterday I read a thread on another sub-reddit about women getting berated and bullied by other women for not (yet) having children and today I read the opposite. That just shows that women can't win. We're damned if we do (in this case have kids) and damned if we don't.

  25. The problem is that people should just mind their own damn business. If someone doesn't want kids, leave them alone, if someone wants kids, leave them alone.

  26. As a person who has been decidedly Child Free for as long as I can remember, I completely agree. I absolutely cannot stand to even visit child-free environments because it really is just an awfully toxic anti-birther circle jerk.

  27. I don’t hate kids I hate parents that expect the world to revolve around their kids. I guess I hate parents but kids aren’t too bad most of the time.

  28. I just hate when child free people resort to disrespecting people with children AND the children themselves. You can't preach about wanting people to respect your choice then turn around insulting them for theirs. Also, why insult a child as a grown ass adult.

  29. i left that subreddit last week, it was getting too much. It just became a contest to have the best story about someone "bingo-ing" them.

  30. Some of us just don't wanna bring children into such a fucked up world, but I still think my neice is the cutest little girl in the world ❤

  31. The world really isn't as bad as people think. People don't want to admit it because there's s weird fetishism for doom and gloom. We habe major problems but mostly the world is s better place now for most people.

  32. What's wrong with the world? Human suffering is at an all time low. Technology has give life meaning other than trying to find your next meal or waiting for genghis khan to come rape and pillage your village.

  33. As a childfree person, I 100% agree. People (including some members of my own family) think I HATE children because of these cf spaces. There’s a huge number of reasons that people don’t want children, but these cf communities default to “I hate children and I love money” which I just can’t identify with. I want to be the cool aunt, not the enemy.

  34. There are childfree people who like children, childfree people who hate children, and childfree people who don't care. The childfree population, just like any population, is not homogenous.

  35. I think it’s just natural for people with opposing opinions to hate each other. The loudest people are almost always going to be the most toxic. Some people with kids hate childfree people because they love their children and can’t imagine life without them. Some of them will preach about changing their mind and loving children and it’s a gift. Childfree people hate people with children because they sometimes pressure them to want kids. The extreme ones take it too far and bash people for having/wanting children.

  36. Nothing wrong with having kids, but I don’t want them at all. The financial burden and lifelong responsibility is too much for the lifestyle I want to live

  37. im child free and i do not hate children. i have 5 nieces and nephews and also consider my friend's children my extended nieces and nephews too. i love spending time with them and including them in my life. i didnt have my own children because it never worked out for me and i get what a lot of childless people say, i'm also tired of the questioning and people making me feel like i'm less than because i didnt have them. my life is still full even though i'm childless. not everyone needs to procreate and not even needs to or should adopt/foster children.

  38. It really is a bad argument. Not every child behaves the same way at all. And no people who are alive right now actually asked to be born - it just happened without our consent. I'm sure plenty of people never wanted to be a child or any other stage of life in the first place, and would rather have been born at a different time period.

  39. Yeah same. Like I know I was a kid, and I hated it. I hated being a kid with no freedom and hated being around other kids. I was the kid even in high school that only hung around the parents at my marching band events.

  40. I loathe children, but I don’t brag about it. I don’t feel like there is a community of people who celebrate people like me. I think if anything I’m happy to finally be old enough that people have stopped telling me I’ll feel differently when I’m older.

  41. I work with kids who are traumatized and abused. I love kids, fully dedicated my life to helping them. Seeing all these kids who are so fucked up because their parents thought it would be a great idea to procreate but they can barely even care for themselves is why I’m an anti natalist. Humans aren’t a good thing (yes I include myself). I’m not a dick about my views, and don’t push them on others but I cannot wrap my head around how people think it’s morally ok to bring new life into a world full of extreme suffering. I’d rather adopt or foster.

  42. Honestly, those subs are just a haven to the antithesis of the the overwhelming consensus that society holds, that all babies are precious forms of life and your life is less complete until you have one. Like I've known many of people in my family who have parroted endless tropes about how your life gets to be so much more meaningful after having a kid, which is probably true and not really the issue. The issue is how that gets talked about constantly but its shrugged off once you start to point out how exhausting and how much of a sacrifice having children definitely is. It's like the attitude for many is "well I sacrificed in this way so if you don't do exactly like I did, then you're just being selfish"

  43. Your mistake was assuming the childfree subreddit represents anything more than a minority fringe group of willingly childless people.

  44. I frequent this subreddit, and besides a bit of snarking here and there, I don't really hate kids. I just think raising children would be my own personal hell. People have autonomy and need to be able to make whatever lifestyle choices they can to feel fulfilled. While there's a great many parents out there who love and support their children and are ecstatic about raising them, There's also many regretful parents, and this is a pretty forbidden topic.

  45. This is an amazing response! I've been a part of the childfree sub for about a year or so and the people in that sub are super nice and supportive. I've only seen maybe a handful of posts/comments that I've downvoted. In my experience, the people that sub are just so caring and they're able to relate to the same issues I have with bingos and all that

  46. I like having children around and oftenly spend time and entertain little kids when for example guests bring theirs so I dont hate them but I'm pretty sure I dont want to raise any of my own

  47. I don't want children because the world is in a bad shape. I don't want to bring them into a world where they will just suffer. Plus I just know I wouldn't be able to afford it

  48. I have seen people complain from there why they are hated for being child free. Other childfree people assume us parents are jealous of their lives. No, maybe it's because of their nasty attitudes and their disdain about kids and parents, not because they are child free.

  49. I suspect because it seems like everything is geared to be being "family friendly"... I went out to a bar a couple of years back and it explicitly stated NO UNDER 18s IN THE BAR AREA (bar area clearly marked) I stood with a friend and she was telling me what a lying cheating f**king c*nt her now ex was.. and the woman next to us told my friend off like she was 4 not 40 "please don't swear in front of my child" .. my friend turned and pointed to the age sign and told her he shouldn't even be in the bar area and her response was " oh he wants to keep me company" WTAF?????

  50. I'm just trying to understand why you self censored "pi55e5" when your username is what it is. Also this is Reddit; you can fucking swear.

  51. This sentiment comes from entitles parents who think no expensive Resturant, no special occasion special enough, no situation where the rest of us shouldn’t have the pleasure of dealing with their children. Yes I’m sure babysitters are expensive. But tough. Deal with it. Don’t being your kid to a crowded theatre and have them talk during the movie. Don’t bring your kid to an expensive restaurant unless they can behave. This is where the hate comes from.

  52. I'm CF and I don't really like kids, as in I don't like to be in their company, they annoy me and their presence is tiresome. I can get my shit together and act normally with children in my family a few hours at a time, but I don't enjoy it. Parents can be a pain in the arse too when all that matters to them is their tiny wheeny shiny snowflake princess baby, or when they expect special treatment due to being a parent.

  53. It's like someone leaving "Iceland" because they don't like "Icelanders". And then someone telling them.. "Hey, YOU were and Icelander once!".

  54. Because you're being a hypocrite by complaining about a child's behavior when you yourself was also once immature and childish. Expecting children not to behave like children is dumb

  55. I think when you yourself know how bad your childhood was, it's perfectly natural to be afraid of giving another human being a similar life to the one you despise.

  56. Read some of the Reddit posts in certain subs. If they don’t hate kids, then they fooled me. They do a bad job at showing any empathy or understanding when it comes to children and talk about them as if their not human.

  57. I think it's the words "crotch goblin" "breeders" etc that make people think they hate kids, most people in that sub are reasonable they're just sick of hearing about kids this kids that or having their life disrupted by the sound of a poorly parented child.

  58. Meh, it gets annoying how parents act like the world owes them because the majority of them made the conscious choice to have children.

  59. I agree that's annoying but it's like its been switched around and now the people who talk the most shit are unstable child free people, from what I've seen at least.

  60. I don’t judge people who choose not to have kids but I 100% feel judged by a lot of those same people. I don’t think I am one of those obnoxious parents who let their kids be obnoxious or expect special treatment because I have them. But someone has to have kids or else who will work in 20-40 years lol

  61. So, it's perfectly fine to have the hubris to bring an innocent being into this dying, corrupt world COMPLETELY AGAINST THEIR WILL, expecting them to thrive in this nightmare society that you helped create (but won't live to see), all because YOU want more of YOU. That's A-OK. But, having some sense of pride for defying your own biological, human impulses for the greater good of all things is a problem. Makes sense.

  62. Oh no the sub they are talking about genuinly wants children to die and people to go extinct entirely. They also act like the very parents they hate talking as though they are amazing gods for simply not conceiving.

  63. When something becomes a person's main identifier, they often become zealots about it. Just as MRA pages are prone to extreme thought processes, it is consistent that Child-Free Lifestyle forums would become similar.

  64. Parenthood can be rough at times. I had one difficult child and one angel. Parenthood is easier with some kids, more difficult with others.

  65. It is the same as having a really shitty job. Do I feel bad for plumbers, nurses, military and roofers yeah for sure you picked a job a lot of people wouldn't want to do. You aren't a hero for it though and I don't want to hear you complain and I am not going to treat you like you are better than other people who made different easier choices.

  66. I’m a parent and don’t find many parents claiming to be hero’s. Who are you following on social media? Are you unable to mute, unfollow, or block them? Is their post so annoying and/or offensive to you that you join “child fee groups”? Funny thing about child free groups is all they talk about children and parents, isn’t that what you’re trying to avoid? Like your hate for parents is strange, like you’re Timmy’s dad and parents are Dinckleberg.

  67. Its because they think they are somehow "quirky" and "unique" for disliking children which is an intrinsically unnatural reaction. Maybe they are also trying to justify their lifestyle of not having kids which is also very unnatural, their bloodline is dead with them so they have to somehow come up with arguments why that isnt a bad thing.

  68. As a child-free person I genuinely feel like most of the "children are terrible" quotes are just jokes. I have a brother 18 years younger than me and while I love him, I would lost my mind if I had to live with that kid full-time. What I think is even worse is when parents feel the need to post literally EVERYTHING their child does acting like it's an accomplishment. My condescending judgmental SIL literally posted that her kid went outside and found some rocks. I don't understand how a kid doing something animals do is interesting.

  69. Somewhat agree, but I think this is just like the extreme faction of any community. I think most childfree people would simply like the respect that parents receive and don’t want to be shamed for not wanting children. However I concur that some people are far too judgmental of parents and abhor children, and it’s uncomfortable and wrong. It’s all about respecting each other’s choices so long as they aren’t hurting you. Should be simple but unfortunately it isn’t always.

  70. Well obviously, their logic is that they know the trouble parents go through to trying to raise a child because they were once children. The difference is that they didn't choose to be born and they're already here. There are enough people in the world to reproduce, the world doesn't need them too.

  71. Same with the hardcore atheists. Not enough to just not be religious. Not enough to just come to a conclusion that there is no God. You have to actively hate and degrade the religious. Well what about the religious people who hate and degrade me? Well I thought you were supposed to be better than them? You don't believe in that fairy tale stuff, and are supposed to be a better human in this world.

  72. I don't intentionally try to degrade the religious, but I also don't pretend like their beliefs are worthy of respect, any more than a flat earther's beliefs are worthy of respect.

  73. I also find it ironic that a lot of the child free people who hate children and think they have no business being out in public “ruining” their good time are also the ones who adopt dogs, call them “fur babies” dressing them in clothes and taking them to restaurants and grocery stores.

  74. You think so because you went in a place that has a concentrated topic of a certain opinion? Lol. If you compare to the entire reddit, its just a group of few people. It's like saying omg its so normal to have iPhones because in the iPhone subreddit everyone uses iPhones. Check out a subreddit of parents.

  75. Yes. Human existence is nothing but suffering. I regret not having offed myself at 20-something. There would be less of me. So much win.

  76. Personally, i hate seeing children in places that they don't belong. If you decided to poop out your narcissistic clones, at least keep them away from places couples go to have dinner. If you choose to have kids, you now eat at fucking friendly's and MacDonald's. And your movie theater experience is now relegated to PG rating or G.

  77. If it has a kids menu kids being present shouldn’t be complained about and if the kids are clearly old enough to behave (e.g 16+) then there should be no issue with them at a nice restaurant

  78. As a parent to young children, I actually don't disagree with you (other than the narcissistic clone part). This is where other parents definitely go wrong with young kids. But, if my very well behaved tween or teen (in like 7 years) is invited to come with me to a nice restaurant and acts like a young adult, is that something that bothers you?

  79. The world needs smart people to have kids. If you know your too dumb to do it right, then please keep your genetics out of the gene pool.

  80. I agree, as long as everyone would raise their kids to be decent human beings and not overly sensitive spoiled brats, I don't care what people do or don't do with their genitals.

  81. I hate parents and the presence of children(although i dont blame them) when you become an adult without children (27-35) you relise how increadibly self absorbed, un-self aware and generally rude and seld-entitled parents are!!! Its actually outragious, they think the world revolves around them and their child and that people give a fuck. Nobody gives a fuck, your kid smells like feaces and puts their dirty hands allover stuff we regular folks might wanna use later. I dont blame the kids tho, i feel for them being stuck with those kind of adults all the time. What happens to womens brains when a child passes through their canal that makes them instantly insufferable and entitled?

  82. Not wanting children is fine, hating children is fucking weird. People who hate children but treat their dogs like actual children are the worst.

  83. Child free here... I love kids, they're amazing adorable and sometimes I do wish I chose that path. However, my husband and I just have other goals in life and contribute to the world in ways that would be much more challenging with kids.

  84. Those people are the worst. You can always spot them really easily in public. They’re the clueless assholes who look over in disgust as a parent is trying to calm down a fussy baby or toddler on a plane or in a restaurant. It’s like, instead of boring a hole through the atmosphere with your idiot eyes, why don’t you learn about decorum? Bloody losers.

  85. Because they themselves are children..............................................................................................

  86. There are legitimate concerns for people who are childfree. To say that having children dramatically changes your daily life, social options, and perspectives on the world is an understatement.

  87. Kids can be annoying, teens can be annoying, old people can be annoying. I just hate all people equally from birth to the grave. Lol jk but really I am a parent and have friends who choose to be child free. My experience in the real world is child free people have various reasons and some actually play with my children. I on the other hand am around children so much when I’m with other adults I’m like kids go play somewhere else. I don’t even know why it’s a thing for people to care one way or another.

  88. I"m just glad those people are nowadays able to decide that they are not going to have children. Let them vent and hate on children in their little bubble. I don't want children myself but I don't understand the constant bitching about them either. Sometimes it's best to just not engage with some people.

  89. I agree with you on that, the u.s. is a s******* country and perhaps we need to redefine what the word third world actually means then. The state of Healthcare in America could definitely fall under the third world category.

  90. Maybe in some cases but I choose to be child free and my 2 best friends had kids in the last couple of years and they consider me an uncle to them and I love the kids and my friends who had kids. I just personally don’t want that situation for myself.

  91. I'm a part of the child free/anti natalism community and I really do not understand this weird animosity towards children. That's definitely not what these communities are about.

  92. This is another one of those situation where people seem to forget that the majority of the people there are 1) children, 2) or very very young adults, for instance, 18-23.

  93. People are 100% in their right to want to be child free but they not entitled to hate children for just existing or hate on other who wish to be parents.

  94. I think it's become an outlet for disenfranchised young people to talk about how they can barely afford to take care of themselves and how it's immoral to have kids looking towards our collective future

  95. I don't really like children, don't hate them though, that would be unnecessary. I am and always will be child free of course, but I don't like certain subreddits that exists just to spew hatred on parents or children. I got a lot of reasons for not wanting children, but I still understand why other want to.

  96. I personally don't want to have children because I think it's cruel to potentially pass down all my medical issues to a kid who had no choice. It's exactly what happened to me and it's miserable.

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